I know a young lady named Hortense
Whose poems just do not make sense!
She writes them in latin
Whilst dressed in pink satin,
And they’re all in the present tense!
I know a young lady named Hortense
Whose poems just do not make sense!
She writes them in latin
Whilst dressed in pink satin,
And I wish she’d mend my fence!
When a young lady named Kate
Invited me out on a date,
My good friend Miss Lou
Lost more than her shoe,
But we all enjoyed our date!
When I found a young lady named Lin
Hiding in my kitchen bin
I said, with a sigh,
“I’m an open minded guy,
But to hide in my bin is a sin!”.
When a young lady of an ancient profession
Said, “sir, I must make a shocking confession,
Do you know
A bishop Jo?”,
I replied, “dear madam, please show some discretion!”.
A young man whose name is Lee
Has a degree in philosophy.
He is extremely clever
And married to Heather,
And he serves a mean cream tea!
When a young lady named Leigh
Composed a poem about me,
Of course I was flattered,
But the fish wasn’t battered,
So we had steak for tea!
There once was a virile young man
Who, on seeing a passing pram,
Doffed his hat
To the mother,
And said, “I once had a lover,
Who looked a lot like that . . .!”.
When a young man named Coker
Said, “your poetry ’tis mediocre”,
I gazed into the fire
And replied, “do you admire
“This poker, my late friend coker?”
A young lady who comes from Kent
Has all her money spent
On expensive gifts for me,
Which is strange, you see,
I’m married to a girl from Ghent!
A young man named Matt
Owns a very strange hat.
It mews and it purrs,
And its covered in furs,
And he calls that hat a cat!
K Morris - Poet 