When a cultured young lady named Ann
Went and dated a white van man,
She spoke of great Shakespeare,
Which he found quite queer –
But they had fun in his van …
White Van Man
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Tag Archives: humorous verse
Feisty Miss White
When a pretty young lady named White
Said, “I will turn out the light”.
And I said, “then get into bed?”,
She smacked me hard on the head.
Those nurses can get feisty at night!
Those nurses they
Terrible Old Bore
When a rude young man named Moore
Said, “you are a terrible old bore!”.
I gave him a smile
And then, with great style,
I kicked Moore out of the door!
Too Much Partying!
When I met a young lady in Soho
Who told me her name it was Flow,
I bought her and Jane
Lots of overpriced fake champagne
And awoke with a bloke in old Soho!
The Vicar’s Sermon
When the noble and erudite vicar Winning
Gave a fine sermon condemning all sinning,
Rose and Miss Spink
Gave him a wink.
And the congregation all fell about grinning!
Grace the Magician
A magician who is known as Grace
Has made many men vanish without trace.
There’s a magic spade
And a secluded glade.
And the police are looking for Grace …
A Good Investment
When a scantily clad young lady in Chester
Said, “sir, won’t you become my investor?”,
And I asked her why.
She said, “my name is Sky.
And I’m a very hot prospect in Chester!”
Moral Relativist
When a young lady that I once kissed
Said, “tell me, are you a moral relativist?”,
I said, “darling Lou,
Would that bother you?”,
She said, “I liked it when we kissed …!”
When a Young Lady Wearing 1 Spectacle
When a young lady wearing 1 spectacle
Said, “Kevin, tell me, are you respectable?”,
I said to her, “Ria,
I have been called insincere.
But I have never been called respectable!”
Gossip
Heels at night
And creaking bedsprings.
A morning blackbird sings.
It’s song heard
By neighbours who delight
In what they overheard
The other night …
K Morris - Poet 