When a scantily clad young lady in Chester
Said, “sir, won’t you become my investor?”,
And I asked her why.
She said, “my name is Sky.
And I’m a very hot prospect in Chester!”
A Good Investment
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Tag Archives: funny poem
Moral Relativist
When a young lady that I once kissed
Said, “tell me, are you a moral relativist?”,
I said, “darling Lou,
Would that bother you?”,
She said, “I liked it when we kissed …!”
When a Young Lady Wearing 1 Spectacle
When a young lady wearing 1 spectacle
Said, “Kevin, tell me, are you respectable?”,
I said to her, “Ria,
I have been called insincere.
But I have never been called respectable!”
Tea Anyone?
When a young man using Chat GPT
Asked it to make him some tea,
It wrote about Ceylon
And hallucinated about Ron.
But he still hasn’t got his tea!
Pink Socks
When a young lady wearing pink socks
Walked into a shop full of clocks,
The shop owner named Lyme
Said, “it is high time
That you wore something with those socks!”.
The Joys of Cheese
When an elderly gentleman named Mr Foster
Choked on some cheese whilst in Gloucester.
A doctor called Louise
Said, “he liked cheese!
And he died whilst eating Double Gloucester!”
Wet Mops
When young ladies waving very wet mops
Jumped and danced on the table tops,
All the old gentlemen cheered.
While I shaved my beard.
And the waiters they called the cops!
Only 9
When a young lady who is 9
Said, “all boys are far from divine!”,
And with her water pistol
Blasted them all to Bristol!
They forgave her as she’s only 9!
Draughts or Chess
I know an extremely pretty young barmaid
And many a game we have played.
When I say to her, “Bess,
Shall we play draughts or chess?”,
She winks at me does that barmaid …!
Out Shooting Grouse
When I met a gentleman out shooting grouse
Who said, “sir, have you seen my spouse?”.
And I said, “I’ve seen Moriah
In a haystack with the squire!”,
He said, “I’ll shoot more than those grouse!”
K Morris - Poet 