I know a young lady called May
Who told me a limerick risqué.
I experienced delight
Throughout the night
But she won’t repeat it today
Category Archives: creative writing
There Was A Young Lady Called Lorraine
There was a young lady called Lorraine
Who’s character lacked any stain.
An old rake named Paul
Said “most girls fall,
But I can not conquer Lorraine!”.
There was a young lady called Lorraine
Who’s character lacked any stain.
While on her wedding bed
She most properly said
“My virtue I shall retain!”.
Lessons
Flirts
In short
Skirts
And heels.
Life steals
Away in ththoughts
Of “did” and “ought”.
No lessons are taught
To he who bought
The girl in the short
Dress’s time for a while.
Her smile
And a caress
That ends in distress.
Free Verse: The Poetry Book Fair (Sunday 23 September 2018)
On Sunday 23 September, the Poetry Book Fair takes place in London.
Publishers of free verse will be present as will the Poetry Society.
For details please visit, http://www.poetrybookfair.com/
Hocking
A young lady by the name of Hocking
Was always my poetry mocking.
When she passed away
I’m sorry to say
That her end was truly shocking …
There was a young lady called Hocking
Who lost a fine silk stocking.
A vicar named Hogg
Owned a large black dog
Which ate that fine silk stocking …
The Evening Falls
The evening falls.
Bird calls
Gradually fade.
The woodland glade
Resounds to the owl’s cry.
I sigh
And read on.
Another day has gone.
And now tis poetry
And me.
(The birds of the day are, to my mind, very different from the owl. As day ends, the night bird resumes his throne, and the birds of the day are silent until the morrow).
I Know A Young Lady of Cadiz
I know a young lady of Cadiz
Who’s name was Louise or Liz.
When the police went looking for her
She changed into Claire
And we’re sat here drinking fizz …
Kim
I know a young lady called Kim
Who asked that I the lights dim.
So I turned them down low
And turned round real slow,,
But Kim had run away with Jim!
I met a young lady called Kim
Who asked that I the lights dim.
So I turned them down low
And turned round real slow.
And Kim was petite and slim …
Another Day
Yesterday, I took my usual route into work with my guide dog, Trigger. The route to my local station entails passing the Queens Hotel, on Church Road in London SE19. On reaching the hotel, Trigger stopped dead in his tracks due to a large crowd of tourists blocking the pavement. The word ”Achtung!” (meaning attention or take care) rang out and a section of the crowd moved to allow Trigger and I through. I did, however have to say “excuse me” several times as others in the crowd had apparently, not heard their tour guide’s “Achtung!”.
On such occasions I try not to let my frustration show, as I know that we British block walkways when abroad and while meandering our way around this sceptered isle. Nonetheless its frustrating when people block pavements, particularly when they can see a visually impaired person approaching with a guide dog or white cane.
My irritation soon subsided when I remembered that the French author, Emile Zola had stayed at the Queens Hotel during its glory days, https://insidecroydon.com/2015/01/08/zolas-exile-in-upper-norwood-and-case-for-two-blue-plaques/
Zola bravely wrote an articl accusing the French authorities of antisemitism for imprisoning a French officer, Dreyfus, (who was of Jewish descent) for providing secret information to Germany. Dreyfus was, in point of fact innocent and was later pardoned by the authorities. However Zola’s criticism lead to the imposition of a fine and a prison sentence. Rather than submit to French “justice” Zola fled to Upper Norwood. (Anyone interested in the “Dreyfus Affair” can read about it here, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dreyfus_affair).
On reaching my local station, I took the train into London Victoria. On arrival in Victoria I was faced by a number of busy roads and was grateful to a lady who helped me to cross 2 of the busiest ones. We chatted briefly and I learned that her name was Marianne, which made me think of Leonard Cohen’s song “So Long Marianne” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZI6EdnvH-8, but, not knowing my helper well I decided not to mention either Cohen or his song!
As I walked along Victoria Street, Trigger suddenly made a dive for the food being eaten by a person who was (I assume) homeless, as they where crouched down by one of the pillars which support the canopy that overhangs a number of the shops. All I could do was apologise! I did, of course feel incredibly guilty as I continued on my way. Trigger should not have taken the food. However whatever was being eaten was at his level and its extremely tempting for any dog (even a guide dog) to help himself in such situations. Also, to be fair to Trigger, given that the food was at his level he may have thought that it was being offered to him.
So, all in all an eventful trip into central London!
Heather and Rose
I know a young lady called Heather
Who likes to dress in leather.
Her good friend Rose
Does poetry compose
About girls who dress in leather …
There was a young lady called Heather
Who wore one single feather.
My good friend Rose
Goes without clothes
In every kind of weather …
