The cook does mutter
About the missing butter,
While the dog licks his lips
And eyes up the chips …
—
Yesterday (25 March), I found my guide dog Trigger with his nose in a tub of butter. I had heard a crash in the kitchen earlier. however, on investigating and there appearing to be nothing amiss, I returned to the living room, until the sound of my hungry canine tucking into a tub of butter reached my ears!
There was an old reactionary called Paul
Who said “I shall forestall
The coming age”,
So, in rage
He built a very high wall!
There was a young lady called Sky
Who stood at six feet high.
When she removed her high heeled shoes,
Six inches she did lose,
Which made her boyfriend cry.
There was a young boy called Ed
Who wrote a story about his ted.
His mother did remark,
“It is getting dark,
And you and ted must go to bed!”
(Ted or teddy, is frequently used as a shortened form of teddy bear, particularly by young children).
There was a young man called Matt
Who said “poetry is old hat”.
His brother Jim
Disagreed with him.
It ended in a spat!
There was a young leader called Lee
Who shouted “all you people follow me!”.
He ran straight ahead,
Then stopped dead,
On account of hitting a tree!
There was a young man called Nile
Who kept a pet crocodile.
The creature dreamed
Until, it seemed
He was back in the river Nile.
There was a young lady called Leigh
Who climbed a very tall tree.
She yelled, with a frown
“Help me get down!”,
But I was lost at sea!
There was a young Conservative called Fred
Who dressed all in red.
His Socialist friend Yvette
Said “I have never yet
Seen a Tory turn so red”!
There was a young man called Jerry
Who was overly fond of sherry.
He drank it all day
And his wife would say
“You will get no sense out of Jerry”!
K Morris - Poet 