Category Archives: short stories

Oh for a Quiet Pint

As a small child I was fascinated by the behaviour of others. This interest has remained with me and perhaps helps to explain at least partially why I write

Yesterday morning I popped into my local Wetherspoon pub for a healthy breakfast consisting of bacon (somewhat burned as it happens), sausages, hash browns, eggs, beans and toast (the diet which I began two weeks ago is going well I am pleased to report)! There I was wondering what I should order once I’d finished my starter when the comparative peace was disturbed by two gentlemen. They took a seat at a table behind me and proceeded to entertain the boring customers who had just popped in for a breakfast or a quiet pint.

The two men where obviously engaged in trying to crack a puzzle as one of them remarked to his companion that they had 15 minutes to find the solution. The same man then proceeded to extol the virtues of Paul Weller’s Peacock Soup. Well I thought he said Peacock Soup but as he began to tunefully regail (tunefully being a matter of opinion) us pub goers it became apparent that the song was in fact called Peacock Suit (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOYrioF-hB8). The trio sang with such gusto that I felt the necessity of eating more quickly in order that I might escape into the open air and enjoy the singing of my feathered friends.

“Fuck”, “Fuck” the ring leader exclaimed on several occasions. The language was so far as I was able to ascertain a result of his inability to solve that troublesome puzzle while Weller’s song failed to provide the clue enabling him to crack the code. Would that I had known the answer, I would have happily confided it in the 2 gentlemen (anything for a bit of peace and quiet)!

What struck me about the whole episode was the complete lack of awareness of the presence and/or the wishes of the trio’s fellow pub goers. I don’t think that their behaviour was deliberately rude (they thanked the bar staff for bringing their food), however there was a complete mental blank so far as the needs of others where concerned.

Of course pubs can be (and frequently are) noisy places but I have rarely, if ever seen two men dominate a public house in that manner before. Had I been tempted to stay on after my breakfast and tea to indulge in something a little stronger the presence of those two songsters would have deterred me from doing so. Oh well perhaps I can incorporate the incident into a future story.

The First Time Book PromotionI am giving away free copies of my ebook, The First Time. The main story in my collection of short stories explores why Becky, a young graduate with a first class degree in English literature enters the world’s oldest profession as an escort and the effects of her decision on both Becky and her fellow escort and friend Julie. Other stories look at what happens when machines attain human level intelligence. If you would like a free copy of The First Time please send an e-mail to drewdog2060 at Tiscali dot co.uk (the address is rendered in this manner to try and defeat spammers)! For further information on The First Time and my other books please visit my Amazon author page at http://www.amazon.co.uk/K.-Morris/e/B00CEECWHY/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0

I am giving away free copies of my ebook, The First Time. The main story in my collection of short stories explores why Becky, a young graduate with a first class degree in English literature enters the world’s oldest profession as an escort and the effects of her decision on both Becky and her fellow escort and friend Julie. Other stories look at what happens when machines attain human level intelligence. If you would like a free copy of The First Time please send an e-mail to drewdog2060 at Tiscali dot co.uk (the address is rendered in this manner to try and defeat spammers)! For further information on The First Time and my other books please visit my Amazon author page at http://www.amazon.co.uk/K.-Morris/e/B00CEECWHY/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0

Communal Living Anyone?

Can people live together in a state of equality by which I mean a society in which resources are shared equally and each individual contributes to the good of the whole community? The collapse of the former Soviet Union together with it’s former satelites in Eastern Europe has lead many to contend that such a state of afairs is pie in the sky. States which aim at equality inevitably degenerate into dictatorships which are neither equal or free the argument goes. But what about small communities or communes? Can groups of like minded individuals come together and live in a state of equality in which each person contributes to the common good? In any case how should we define the common good? Does it exist?

I have an idea for a story in which the above themes will be explored. I envisage a group of idealistic people joining together to farm the land in common and escape from what they perceive to be the materialism and corruption of capitalist society. Will their little community work or is it doomed to failure? Watch this space.

Books to Prop Up the Wonky Leg on your Coffee Table

Yesterday’s (12 July) Daily Mail contains an article regarding the books which people most frequently fail to finish. The survey was carried out by the Goodreads website and shows E L Jame’s Fifty Shades of Grey and J K Rowling’s The Casual Vacancy as being the books which readers most often fail to finish. I must confess to having read neither book so I am not in a position to impart words of wisdom on either work. I have, however read War and Peace in the original Russian and I must admit to having derived great pleasure from the experience. It was hard going in places but I felt a real sense of achievement once I read those final words, “the end”. OK I’d better come clean. I have indeed read War and Peace from cover to cover but it was in translation rather than the original Russian! I did, however plough through 20 odd braille volumes which took up some considerable space on my book shelves!

For the article please visit http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2361598/JK-Rowling-EL-James-bestsellers-list-books-readers-finish.html

Anyone Fancy An Apple?

My three books (“The First Time”, “Samantha” and “Sting In The Tail”) have all been written on my Sony Vio Windows 7 Home Premium laptop. I purchased it in John Lewis approximately 3 years ago and it has on the whole served me extremely well. Being blind (I don’t possess sufficient vision to read the screen) I use screen reading software called Jaws which converts text into speech and braille enabling me to read the contents of the screen. I’m currently using Jaws version 11 which is several years out of date (the current version is Jaws 14) and given the march of technology I’m finding that an increasing number of websites do not work as they should or, more correctly Jaws can’t interact with them correctly. Jaws 11 cost over £800 and to upgrade from the current version to Jaws 14 would cost approximately the same amount. This seems crazy as the cost of my laptop was £529 so in effect I could buy another laptop and still have change for the money I’d spend purchasing the latest version of Jaws.

The alternative to the above is to buy an Apple Mac. The advantage to Apple products from the point of view of visually impaired people is that they come equipped with high quality built in speech known as voiceover unlike Microsoft PCS where the blind user has to purchase additional expensive software such as Jaws (I’m not counting Narrator which is next to useless).

I’m used to I pads so purchasing an Apple PC wouldn’t be a complete leap into the dark. However I am familiar with how Jaws interacts with Windows. I know the short cuts for interacting quickly with Windows and learning Voiceover on an Apple computer would be a bit of a challenge. However I need to bite the bullet sooner or later and decide whether to upgrade Jaws or buy an Apple Mac otherwise I’ll be left with an increasing number of websites and applications which either do not work with Jaws 11 or, at best work imperfectly.

I’m rather fond of my Sony Vio laptop. It has served me well in my writing and other tasks. There is nothing wrong with the machine and it could continue to be a good little work horse for years to come (famous last words)! Anyway this evening I’ll be borrowing a friend’s Apple Mac so I’ll have the opportunity to experiment with Voiceover and decide whether the fruit or Windows (with Jaws) is the way forward. What a shame that Microsoft don’t include a high quality text to speech facility with their computers then blind people wouldn’t be faced with these expensive choices.

Update To My Goodreads Author Profile

I have now added my collection of short stories, Sting in the Tail and Other Stories, to my Goodreads Author’s Profile
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18167570-sting-in-the-tail-and-other-stories.

I DO NOT COMPREHEND

One of my regrets is my inability to speak any language other than my native tongue, English. I don’t know why I should have a mental block so far as learning languages is concerned. I received good marks in both English language and literature a-levels and went on to read history and politics at university which entailed having a good grasp of English. Despite my ability to make foreigners roll about holding their sides with laughter when attempting to converse with them in their native tongue I was pleased to see that my collection of short stories, “Sting In The Tail And Other Stories” is available in German, French and a number of languages which I am unable to speak! Thank goodness for Amazon’s translators whether human or software based! To learn more about Sting In The Tail please visit http://www.amazon.co.uk/Sting-tail-other-stories-ebook/dp/B00DFK6R54