There was a young man called Jack
Whose view of the world was black.
When they asked him “why?”
He said, with a sigh,
“because I always take the flak …!”
There Was A Young Man Called Jack
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Tag Archives: humour
There Was A Young Lady Called Gale
There was a young lady called Gale
Who wrote to her lover in braille.
He said with a look most perplexed,
“Really, I’m vext,
For my fingers,can not read braille …!”
There Was A Young Lady Called Gay
There was a young lady called Gay
Who ate apple pie every single day.
She preferred it with mustard
And refused to eat custard.
As to why? She refused to say!
There Was A Young Lady Called Claire
There was a young lady called Claire
Who fell asleep while climbing the stair.
Should you ask me why
I shall make reply,
“How would I know, I wasn’t there!”
I met a Maid
I met a maid.
Staid
And proper was she,
Who said unto me,
“I love thee.
Let us make free,
But not too much so
For a girl must go
To the marketplace,
Where she will embrace
The latest fashion,
For it is her passion
To please her man.
Therefore can
You take care of me
And you will see
Just how much I love thee …!”
I said, “Oh maid,
Most staid
And proper.
I thank you for your generous offer,
But I regret my coffer
Can not maintain a professional shopper.
Be not sad
For you may find some other lad
Mad
Enough to grant your dearest wish.
Go forth and angle
And you will no doubt entangle
Some other happless fish!”
There Was A Young Lady Called Viv
There was a young lady called Viv
Who lived in a very big sieve.
She said, “despite the rain,
I staunchly maintain
Its great to live in a sieve …”!
Its Raining
Its raining out there.
I swear
That I will go out later,
But, seeing an alligator
I shall continue to reside
Safely Inside!
Perhaps I am in denial
And it is a crocodile
That lurks below.
Maybe I should my resolution harden
And go out into my garden
With my dog
And admit that that fearsome creature is, in fact a log …!
I maintain
That despite the rain
Crocodile and alligator
That I will go
Below
But let it be later …!
There Was A Young Man Called Baccus
There was a young man called Baccus
Who caused a bit of a fraccus
By getting drunk one day
And leading his colleagues astray.
Our employer he threatened to sackus!
There Was A Young Man Called Marcello
There was a young man called Marcello
Who loved to play on the cello.
He wasn’t very good
And his neighbours would
Bang on the walls and bellow!
—
There was a young man called Marcello
Who loved to play on the cello.
He played at night,
Giving his neighbours a fright.
They would bellow, “stop that racket Marcello”!
There Was A Young God Called Ra
There was a young god called Ra
Who borrowed his girlfriend’s bra,
To use as a duster.
It was all he could muster.
There relationship didn’t go very far!
