A young man by the name of Spink
Is very fond of a drink.
But when he broke into mine
And drank my fine wine
The judge sentenced him to clink!
(Clink is another word for prison).
—
When a man by the name of Spink
Became lost in a good deal of drink
His wife called Clair,
Who is young and fair
Gave me a nod and a wink …
—
When, on the winding stair
I met a blond called Flair
My wife Anne
Grabbed a frying pan
And ended that affair!
There was a young man called Chris
Who said, “it will be such bliss
For on Christmas day
I shall marry Fay
Or perhaps it will be Trish …
There once was a poet called Hurd
Who’s poems where only one word.
He used pictures too
Of his young wife Lou.
She’s famous, but few have heard of Hurd!
A man by the name of Spink
Maintains an erotic link
Where a young lady named Bess
Takes off her dress.
Or so I’m told by Spink …
I know a young lady called Suzette
Who works on the internet.
When you click on her link
She’s a girl called Spink
And sometimes she’s Yvette …
A girl by the name of Spink
Is possessed of a particular kink.
But take great care
For I speak of her hair
And one should never insult Miss Spink!
When a naughty young lady called Lou
Was caught stealing a single shoe
A store detective named Ted
Scratched his head
And said, “why did you not steal 2?”
When a talented young authoress called Sue
Got stuck in a public loo
She wrote a novel about a skyscraper
On the cheapest toilet paper
And published it at 2!
They say
That when policemen look young, you are getting old.
I was told
By a lady yesterday,
In a conversational way
That she was born
In the year
I came to old London town
To work.
A jerk
Of recognition within.
Hopes abandoned
There will be no sin …
There was a wealthy Socialist called Jane
Who lived down an exclusive lane.
At her grand parties aplenty
She wept over the poor’s cupboards empty
Whilst sipping her expensive champagne.
—
There was a young lady called Brass
Who’s manners where extremely crass.
The parish priest named Moore
Could hear Brass snore
As he said the evening mass …
