When I saw a young lady dancing
And said, “are you looking for romancing?”.
And I spoke of sin.
She said, “I am lin.
And sir, your luck you are chancing!”
When I Saw a Young Lady Dancing
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Tag Archives: humorous verse
The Nun
I met a pretty young nun
Who offered me lots of fun.
Over our hot breakfast toast
I said, “my kind host,
When did you become a nun?”.
Jean and the Libertine
When I said to a girl named Jean,
“My dear, I’m a complete and utter libertine!”.
She said, “oh my sweet honey
If you have lots of money,
You can be the man in forest green!”.
Janet
When a young lady named Janet
Said, “government should immediately ban it!”.
I said, I know what you mean.
It really is a little obscene.
But wont you just try it, Janet?”.
When I Found a Young Lady Bathing
When I found a young lady bathing
Who said, “sir, I am but faffing”.
And I said “leave my bathtub!”.
She said, “give me a rub”.
And my wife was far from laughing!
When a Young Lady of Great Beauty
When a young lady of great beauty
Said, “sir, it is your bounden duty
To pay my expenses.
There will be recompenses”.
I said, “beauty it rhymes with duty!”.
As I Ascended the Winding Stair
As I ascended the winding stair
I met with my mistress Claire.
Who said, with a frown,
“Your old wife,Mrs Brown,
Just gave me a terrible glare!”.
Passion Killer
Couples in the USA are being advised to wear masks to protect against the transmission of COVID-19 if they have sex. The lunatics are, I think finally taking over the asylum, (see https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-8384891/Couples-arent-quarantining-avoid-kissing-wear-FACE-MASKS-says-study.html).
The above advice sparked the below poem:
How to kill passion.
First, fashion
A mask.
This is a simple task
For some.
A few
May have fun
Its true,
By which I mean
Those who are into the fetish scene!
Doctors say, that, “if you absolutely must
Indulge your lust,
Then wear a mask, for ’twill protect you,
From your lover true”.
It must be said
That romance is dead.
Forget the condom.
Its a mask you should have on!.
A Poet’s Broken Heart
There once was a poet named Gus
Who said, “we have much to discuss
Of literature and art,
And my broken heart”.
But his lover said, “Gus, don’t fuss!”.
Resistance to Social Distance
When ants in a young lady’s kitchen
Showed a complete disregard for social distance,
A lover who was visiting her there
Said, “my dearest darling Claire,
I confess that I’m itching
To report those ants in your kitchen
For demonstrating resistance
To social distance!”.
K Morris - Poet 