Below is my rewrite of the traditional English nursery rhyme, “Who Killed Cock Robin” which is written firmly with my tongue in my cheek. I did say (only yesterday) that I wouldn’t be blogging during the visit of my mum and her partner, however as they are currently ensconced watching television I think that I may safely allow myself a few minutes for blogging!

Who Killed Cock Robin Rewrite

“So, constable who killed cock robin?”

“Well sir Jack Sparow claims to have done it with his bow and arrow”.

“Do we have any independent witnesses to the murder because we wouldn’t want some clever defence lawyer to claim we beat a confession out of Jack Sparow?”

“Well sir Guy the fly claims to have seen Cock Robin Die with his little eye”.

“But Guy the fly was seen by Mike the pike buzzing around the picknick tables, near the lake and that is miles from where Cock Robin died so Guy can’t possibly

have seen him die”.

“Well sir Bob the dog says that he saw Matt the cat viciously  assault Cock Robin and leave him dying in the long grass by the bird table”.

“But Matt the cat was observed chasing Nat the rat by Len the Hen at the time when Cock Robin was murdered. It can’t be Matt. Besides Bob hates Matt the

cat ever since he stole his owner’s hat.”

“OK sir I’ve just received a tip-off from Blair the bear who swares that he saw Clare the hare strangle cock robin with her hair. I’m off to interview Blair

the bear”.

“OK constable you go right there and interview Blair the bear”.