There was a young lady called Gay
Who composed limericks throughout the day.
She read them aloud at night,
Which was much to the delight
Of the owl who lived down her way.
Tag Archives: poems
Lay
Girls in throw-away bras
Exit cars,
Who’s engines continue to idle
As they sidle
Away,
For they
Have a visit to pay.
No poet’s lay,
Just the worn out music does play.
Then they are away
To the self-same place
Where another flushed face
Rushes to forget
Regret
In lust and sweat.
There Was A Young Lady Called Louise
There was a young lady called Louise
Who sailed the high seas
In a fine old ship,
Where she brandished a whip
The sailors for to tease…!
There Was A Young Lady Called Emma
There was a young lady called Emma
Who took ill while visiting Vienna.
She did cough and sneeze,
Then remarked with a wheeze,
“Its freezing here in Vienna”!
Webcam
Being blind
I wry amusement find
When a webcam
(a wam, bam)
Girl follows me on Twitter.
She may dance in a costume of glitter
Bright
For other men at night,
Or, more probably perform in the nude
Acts most crude.
I am no prude
But as I can not see
Thee
Oh tempting nymph, I will not follow back
So you will another follower lack!
Dry your eyes my dear,
Though I fear
You may have nothing to wipe away your tears.
With. Perhaps your lipstick smears
At the thought of wasted years
As you bat your eyes
For lustful guys,
But not for me
Who strictly sticks to poetry …!
There Was A Young Lady Called Emma
There was a young lady called Emma
Who went to dance in Vienna.
When the people asked, “are you an erotic dancer?”
She replied, “I am no chancer,
But perhaps if you pay me a tenner …!”
There Was A Young Man Called Ed
There was a young man called Ed
Who decided his girlfriend to wed.
When he found she hadn’t any money,
He said, “ain’t it funny,
My love for her it is dead!”
There Was A Young Lady Called Lena
There was a young lady called Lena
Who worked as a domestic cleaner.
Clients where very few
And I am afraid it is true
That her customers had never seena!
There Was A Young Lady Called May
There was a young lady called May
Who walked in the fields one day.
She met the queen of the fairies there,
Who said, “beware,
For here you may not stay!”
There Was A Young Man Called Is
There was a young man called Is,
Who married a girl named Ought.
They couldn’t agree
On what should be
And ended up in court!