There was a young man named Neil
Who drank wine with every meal.
He soaked his breakfast in red
And on retiring to bed
Drank white with his friend’s wife Lucille!
There Was A Young Man Called Neil
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Tag Archives: humorous verse
When A Dangerous Young Man Of Bristol
When a dangerous young man of Bristol
Aimed at me his pistol,
My friend, General Napier
Drew forth his rapier
And ended that young man of Bristol!
A Beautiful Young Lady Named Crystal
A beautiful young lady named Crystal
Threatened me with her pistol.
When I said, “what have I done”!
She replied, “I’m up for fun.
You will elope with me to Bristol”!
When A Young Admirer of Titian
When a young admirer of Titian
Made a most shocking admission,
I shook my grey head
And with great sorrow said,
“You are on the road to perdition”!
When A Man Whose Name Is Ted
When a man whose name is Ted
Found a young lady under his bed
He whispered, “upon my life,
You are not my wife.
Speak softly, as she’s sleeping in bed”!
—
When a man whose name is Ted
Found a young lady under his bed
He said, with a sigh,
“I am an open-minded guy,
But my wife she is sleeping in bed”!
—
When a man whose name is Ted
Found a young lady under his bed
He said, “is that you Nell?,
I can not tell
Whether you be living or dead”!
A Young Lady Whose Name Is Peeches
A young lady whose name is Peeches
Likes to frequent crowded beaches.
As she sunbathes in the nude
The vicar, who is no prude,
To that young lady preaches!
—
A young lady whose name is Peeches
Likes to frequent crowded beaches
Where she sunbathes nude,
Which some find crude
As for me, I love those beaches!
I Know A Young Man Named Hogg
I know a young man named Hogg
Who is an admirer of Jacob Rees-Mogg.
He recites all of his speeches
To an English bulldog called Peechs,
And she howls at the speeches of Mogg!
Waking Up Next To A Girl
Waking up next to a girl, with perfect hair
And skin,
I know that I am
A lucky man
But I swear
That I know not where
We met, nor how she got in!
When A Young Lady Named Honey
When a young lady named Honey
Dated me for my money
There grew a rumour
That she had a sense of humour
As I hadn’t any money!
Lee
There was a young man named Lee
Who said, “I want to speak about me”!
As he spoke at great length
I thought, Ggod give me strength”,
But God did not agree!
—
There was a young man named Lee
Who said, “I want to speak about me”!
As he spoke at great length
I gathered all my strength
And jumped into the raging sea!
—
When a young man by the name of Lee
Said, “I want to speak about me”!
I beat upon my chest
And said, “Sir, you jest”!
But he did not agree!
K Morris - Poet 