“Here richly, with ridiculous display, the politician’s corpse was laid away. While all of his acquaintance sneered and slanged, I wept: for I had longed to see him hanged.” Hilaire Belloc.
The Politician
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Category Archives: books
Can someone pass the fountain pen please?
One of my new year’s resolutions was to review books which I’ve purchased in the Amazon Kindle store. Yesterday I received an e-mail from Amazon inviting me to review a book I’d downloaded. Just as I was about to dip my quil pen in the brass ink well which stands in pride of place on my oak desk (well put fingers to keyboard actually but quil pens sound much better)! I noticed that the book which I was being invited to review was my very own work, Samantha! Now how many stars should I provide my own book? And what kind of review should I leave? Answers please on a postcard written with your very own quil pens or, failing that a fountain pen will do! This will, of course be one book which I won’t be reviewing!
If anyone is wondering why I downloaded my own book the answer is a simple one – I wished to have my own copy on my Kindle.
I’m off now to buy blotting paper and fresh ink.
Kevin
Tales of the Unexpected
I have for so long as I can remember enjoyed stories with unexpected endings. As a child growing up in Liverpool I watched ITV’s Tales of the Unexpected (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tales_of_the_Unexpected_%28TV_series%29). Each episode featured a different tale all of which ended unexpectedly.
Tales of the Unexpected was in the back of my mind when I wrote Sting in the Tail (http://newauthoronline.com/2013/03/16/sting-in-the-tail/). In the story a highly educated and charming fraudster meets his match in the most unexpected manner in the form of a blind girl, Laura. The fraudster makes the fatal mistake of perceiving Laura as a poor disabled woman who poses no threat, indeed he determines not to defraud her as stealing from a blind woman is a step to far even for a hard bitten criminal such as him. The fraudster’s fatal mistake is to assume that disability equals intellectual inferiority rendering Laura a helpless victim who he, in a rare moment of conscience determines not to exploit.
Sting in the Tail is above all a story who’s aim as with all stories is to provide enjoyment to the reader, however, as a registered blind person I am also interested to explore how people can, quite erroneously conflate disability with what used to be known as feeble mindedness. As the fraudster finds to his chagrin in Sting in the Tail this is a costly error!
The Mechanical Lover
Human relationships, particularly those entailing love are complex and often messy. They require a good deal of commitment and hard work to maintain. What if, in the future a robot where to be invented with the capacity to demonstrate love or, at the very least to give the appearance of doing so? Let us further suppose that this robot could be produced relatively cheaply bringing it within the reach of a mass consumer market. How popular would such a robot be and what would be the impact of it’s creation on society as a whole?
As I said at the start of this post, relationships require love and commitment. They need to be worked at. In contrast a preprogrammed robot would not, presumably need commitment, the user could programme the machine to replicate his (or her) desires at will. Your own ideal man or woman could be yours in the future for the price of a car and not, necessarily the most expensive model of vehicle.
Doubtless such an invention has the potential to cause great social disruption, however if free citizens in a democracy choose to purchase such artificial persons in the future what right would society have to prevent them from doing so? In modern democracies there is an acceptance among most people that individuals have the right to pursue their own conception of the good/happy life provided that they do not interfere with the equally valid rights of others to strive for their own conception of happiness. Given the prevalence of this liberal perspective what right (if any) would a future society have to place limitations on the development of artificial persons designed to fulfil the emotional and/or sexual needs of future generations? These are interesting issues and ones which I mean to address in future stories.
Hemlock
Hemlock
The girl approached Malcolm and taking his hand in hers intoned in a soft musical voice “Darkling I listen; and for many a time I have been half in love
with easeful death, called him soft names in many a mused rhyme, to take into the air my quiet breath; now more than ever seems it rich to die, to cease
upon the midnight with no pain, while thou art pouring forth thy soul abroad in such an ecstasy! Still wouldst thou sing, and I have ears in vain – to
thy high requiem become a sod”.
The audience, hard bitten venture capitalists all, gaped with wonder at this beautiful girl with her long blonde hair falling in cascades down her back,
at her deep blue eyes and her slender figure.
“OK Professor, the jokes over. Who is this young lady? What is her name?” asked the chairman of the board, Sir Steven Carter.
Professor Steel smiled indulgently and speaking in a manner which he usually reserved for his more obtuse students said “As I explained at the start of
this demonstration the lady you see before you is Becky the first ever truly intelligent robot. Becky is designed for the discerning gentleman, for the
man who wants to be around a beautiful and intelligent lady but who, for whatever reason is not in (or does not wish to be in) a relationship with a flesh
and blood female. Imagine the potential of this invention gentlemen. No more need for the man of means to wine and dine a girl, buy her expensive presents
and (god forbid actually marry her)! If you gentlemen can come up with the finance then your company will be world famous. Imagine being known as the firm
who launched the first ever artificial woman of culture!”
A hand was raised “Yes, the gentleman at the back of the room with the red tie and white shirt”. “Can she er … I mean can Becky do other things”. The Professor
smiled (he smiled a lot but the smile never reached his eyes), “Indeed she can. Becky has a very convincing set of female organs all of which are in perfect
working order. Even gentlemen of culture have their needs and Becky is designed to cater to your, sorry I mean their every whim”.
“I want one” said the chairman. “I’ve often wished to switch off my wife and now this robot has come along it is, at long last possible for me to do just
that”! Miss Mortimer the only female board member looked daggers at the chairman who vissibly shrank in his seat and coloured deeply, “I was only joking,
no offence meant” he mumbled turning as red as the curtains which flanked the stage on which the Professor stood.
Another hand was raised. It was that of Malcolm Fisher the journalist who had been the recipient of Becky’s attentions. “Yes Sir, the gentleman with the
press pass sitting in the front row”. “Isn’t there something sacrilegious about Becky?” “Sacrilegious, what do you mean?” Malcolm thought of Jane, of how
they’d walk for hours in the countryside. One day, as dusk was falling the song of a nightingale had reach their ears. Jane’s eyes had become moist and
turning to Malcolm she said “It’s to beautiful, I want to cry and she quoted those self-same words that that “thing” had just intoned. He’d taken Jane
in his arms and softly kissed away the tears from her gentle brown eyes. With a jolt Malcolm pulled himself back to the present, the Professor was staring
expectantly at him. “I don’t know how to put it accept to say that this invention seems to have crossed some line. Once we have crossed the Rubicon who
knows what will happen”. The Professor suppressed a sigh, “My dear sir man is but a machine. He takes in food to fuel his body and his very mind is but
a highly intricate mechanism for processing thoughts and emotions. Becky is a machine, why should not two machines come together. This invention will enhance
the sum of human happiness by enabling those who can not find (or do not want for whatever reason to find) a human companion and from the perspective of
you gentlemen it will to borrow a phrase mean “loads of money”!
“Well Professor we are certainly very interested in your invention. I’ll discuss it with the board but I’m sure that you will be hearing from us in the
very near future. Many thanks for your informative presentation” said the Chairman.
As he left the building those words of Keat’s popped into Malcolm’s head “As though of hemlock I had drunk”. “I need a drink” he thought turning his steps
in the direction of the nearest pub but perhaps not hemlock.
(The above story can be found in my collection of short stories, The First Time. For this and other stories in this collection please visit http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-First-Time-ebook/dp/B00AIK0DD6 or http://www.amazon.com/The-First-Time-ebook/dp/B00AIK0DD6/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1363296273&sr=8-2&keywords=the+first+time+kevin+morris).
to kindle or not to kindle, that is the question
There is a lot to be said in favour of Amazon from the perspective of authors. KDP Select enables authors to promote their book for free for upto 5 days in any 90 day period (during the recent promotion of my book, Samantha a total of 96 copies where downloaded during the promotion, 3-7 March), a statistic with which I am rather pleased. However there are other aspects of Amazon’s services for authors (in the UK) with which I’d take issue.
On amazon.com there is an option to give Kindle content as a gift. I would dearly like to provide family, friends and readers of my blog with gift copies of my books, however the service does not work in the UK (the country in which I live) so I’m not able to avail myself of this excellent facility.
To my mind authors should be eligible for the same high standard of service irrespective of the country in which they reside. At present those resident in the UK are not obtaining the same services as those living in the USA. I for one hope that Amazon rectifies this situation as a matter of urgency.
Update
For some time now I’ve been meaning to update the About and My Books pages of this blog. Well I’ve finally got around to doing so! The updated pages can be found here http://newauthoronline.com/my-books/ and http://newauthoronline.com/about/
Limbo
It is often said that if people are happy with a product or service they will rarely express their approbation. In contrast where individuals are dissatisfied they will complain vociferously. Looking at the sales of my book, Samantha during it’s free promotion in the Kindle store I see that 96 copies have been downloaded, however as of approximately 20 minutes ago none of those downloaders have left a review or rating. What am I, the author to make of this?
The promotion ran from 3-7 March so it is still early days (Amazon sends e-mails to customers asking if they would like to review books which they have purchased and it is possible that these will prompt purchasers to leave a review or rating), however I know from my own purchasing habits that although I frequently mean to review a book I’ve read I often don’t get round to doing so. When Samantha first appeared on my blog I received a number of likes and encouraging comments which where (and are) much appreciated, however the lack of feedback from purchasers leaves me in limbo not knowing what people think of Samantha. I enjoy writing and will continue to write with or without feedback. However it would still be nice to hear from purchasers of Samantha either via reviews on Amazon or by comments on this blog.
Kevin
Free Book Promotion Closes on 7 March
The free promotion of my book, Samantha ends on 7 March at approximately 12:59 am. To obtain Samantha free please visit http://www.amazon.com/Samantha-ebook/dp/B00BL3CNHI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1362601681&sr=8-1&keywords=k+morris+samantha.
Forever in search of the new
Yesterday (5 March) I popped into my local independent book shop in search of a present for Easter not entailing Cadburys cream eggs! Having purchased a book on the Dinosaurs in Crystal Palace park I fell into conversation with the book shop’s owner. I asked whether the growth in ebooks was impacting on his business. Somewhat to my surprise he replied that he haden’t noticed a fall off in business, he had, however seen a rise in the sale of graphical (picture books). I speculated that the growth in sales of this particular type of literature perhaps stemmed from the low attention span which can flow from excessive use of the internet and he agreed.
The above conversation reminded me of an earlier post on this blog (http://newauthoronline.com/2013/02/02/going-to-hell-in-a-hand-cart/) in which I pointed to the growth in website hopping, the practice entailing the surfer inanely clicking on links with no particular purpose in mind. I argued that this constant search for new and exciting content fosters a spirit of instant gratification and a shallow view of the world. In contrast reading entails concentration and yes, on occasions cudgelling one’s brains in order to comprehend what the author is driving at. In contrast to the inanity which can flow from web surfing reading fosters a deep appreciation for the world in which we live.
To return to my visit to the book shop, perhaps this obsession with the internet is leading to a breakdown in concentration whereby people find it difficult to read anything other than short novels or works containing lots of illustrations. I certainly hope that this is not the case.
Returning to the subject of ebooks, my latest book, Samantha is currently free in the Kindle store (the offer ends on 7 March). For Samantha please visit http://www.amazon.com/Samantha-ebook/dp/B00BL3CNHI
