I know a young lady called Lou
Who composed a poem about a shoe,
As my good friend Jane
Cudgeled her brain
Over her husband’s missing shoe …
There was a young lady called Lou
Who composed a poem about a shoe.
While drunk on cheap wine
All seemed fine
And now I have her shoe …
An elderly squire called Guy
Held Tory views most high.
He lived in the countryside,
Opposed democracy’s rising tide
And shot all the birds that fly!
There once was a werewolf called Guy
Who went out when the moon was high.
When the moon disappeared
He became afeared
And would shake and sometimes cry!
There was a young lady named Bess
Who wore a little black dress
While out on the catwalk.
And people did talk
On account of the split in that dress!
There was a young lady named Lou
Who said “no gentleman are you!”.
I replied in distress
“I must confess
That twas I who stole your shoe!”.
There was a young diplomat called Guy
Who would never knowingly lie.
The ambassador Ruth
Fudged the truth
Which made that young man cry!
There was a young diplomat called Guy
Who would never knowingly lie.
The ambassador Ruth
Thought him uncouth
And rolled her one good eye!
There was a young lady called Hocking
Who lost many a silk stocking.
Her boyfriend, named Hogg
Ran an erotic blog,
Believe me, it really was shocking!
There was a young lady called Lin
Who lived in my wastepaper bin.
I said, with a smile
“Will you stay there a while”,
But she left for my biscuit tin!
There was a young lady called Lin
Who lived in my wastepaper bin.
Being rather witty
And extremely pretty
She led me into sin!
There was a young lady called Lin
Who lived in my wastepaper bin.
When I said, “are you okay?”
She replied “I like it this way”,
That strange young lady called Lin!
There was a young lady called Lin
Who lived in my wastepaper bin.
She made her escape
In a bright red cape
As its better out than in!
There was a young poet called Mo
Who’s work I happen to know.
His poems where so bad
That they drove me quite mad,
So I buried Mo in the snow!
There was a young lady called Lou
Who stood in a pot of glue.
She said, with a sigh
“I don’t know why
I stood in this pot of glue!”.
