There once was a god named Pan
Who married a girl named Ann.
They made music together
Whatever the weather
With the aid of a frying pan!
There once was a god named Pan
Who loved a girl called Ann.
He offered her his heart
But being in love with art
She married his best friend Dan!
There was a young man named Lee
Who said “the world revolves around me”.
Awaking with a start
I said “bless my heart,
Was someone talking to me …”.
There was a young lady called Lou
Who preferred 3 rather than 2.
We went to a discreet hotel
With a girl named Nell
As 3 is better than 2 …
There was a young lady called Divine
Who drank nothing but wine.
This was perfectly okay
Though I’m sorry to say
That she stole the communion wine!
There was a young lady called Chauntele
Who I knew more than well.
Of an evening late
We met at her gate
Strawberries for to sell.
There was a young lady called Chauntele
Who I knew more than well.
Of an evening late
We met at her gate,
But I promised not to tell …
A young lady whose morals were loose
Did the local vicar seduce.
His bishop, named Dave
Looked very grave
And his wife, she turned quite puce!
There was a young lady called Beth
Who refused to dance with Death.
But come close of day
He had his way
And Beth she waltzed with Death
I know a young lady called Lin
Who plays my violin.
At night she plays
And the vicar says
That tis a most terrible sin.
There was a young man called Paul
Who composed a limerick about a ball.
It said nothing profound
And went round and round
And how it ended – I don’t recall
There once was a man called Glass
Who came from the upper class.
His housemaid Claire
Was young and fair
And she polished her master’s brass.
K Morris - Poet 