There was a young writer called Barett
Who had nought to eat but a carrot.
He said, to himself,
“I have little wealth
While my agent she drinks only claret!”
There Was A Young Writer Called Barett
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Tag Archives: limericks
There Was A Young Man Called Hogg
There was a young man called Hogg
Who kept a very large dog.
When people asked “does it bite?”
He replied “he might,
But not if your name it is Hogg!”
—
There was a young man called Hogg
Who kept a very large dog.
They went out in the pitch black
And never came back.
I surmise they got lost in a bog.
—
There was a young man called Hogg
Who kept a very large dog.
They went out one night
And got quite a fright
From the crocodile disguised as a log …!
There Was A Young Poet Called Horace
There was a young poet called Morris
Who laid claim to The Odes of Horace.
When they put him on trial
He said “there can be no denial
That my real name, it is Horace!”
A Short Sighted Police Officer Called Mia
A short sighted police officer called Mia
Arrested a young lady named Tia.
On taking another look,
She said “I mistook
You for my nemesis Maria!”
There Was A Young Man Called Adolf
There was a young man called Adolf
Who was very fond of his golf.
On his wedding day
He stayed away
And played with his golfing partner Rolfe!
There Was A Young Man Called Mike
There was a young man called Mike
Who said “I can do as I like”.
He two-timed his girl
(her name was Pearl).
She said “Mike, get on your bike!”
—
The term To “two-time” is an informal way of indicating that someone has been unfaithful to their partner.
Again, the term “on your bike” is an informal way of saying “never darken my door again” or, to put it more bluntly “get lost”!
There Was An Elderly Poet Called Lott
There was an elderly poet called Lott
Who long ago had lost the plot.
He wrote copious amounts of verse,
Which grew worse and worse,
Although Lott knew it not!
There Was A Young Lady Called Lou
There was a young lady called Lou
Who caused quite a to-do,
When she lost her gown,
In the middle of town.
The crowd it grew and grew!
There Was A Young Lady Called Tia
There was a young lady called Tia
Who lived in constant fear
Of what walked behind,
For she knew in her mind,
‘Twas the devil who lurked in the rear …!
There Was A Young Man Called Tony
There was a young man called Tony
Who went shopping to purchase a pony.
The girl in the bakery said,
“we sell only bread,
And my favourite name it is Tony!”
K Morris - Poet 