microsoft word | K Morris

Oh Microsoft I love you.

I love the way you say in tones sweet

“document 1. Microsoft Word is not responding”.

I relish the opportunity you furnish for me to drink my tea while you hang with such grace and poise.

For the chance to eat my cereal while you continue to stick obstinately I give thanks.

I was in need of a shower so thanks, once more for affording me the opportunity to wash and dress as you continue to hang.

Thank you dear Microsoft for, finally allowing me to complete my poem which runs to an entire 4 lines.

Yours ever so gratefully,

A Humble Computer User.

(The above was written in response to the difficulties experienced while writing my poem, “Epitaph On A Poet” which appeared on this blog earlier today).

Yesterday I breeched one of the cardinal rules of computing. I had taken the day off from the job which pays the bills (with my boss’s permission of course), With the aim of getting stuck in to some serious writing. Having treated myself to a healthy breakfast consisting of hash browns, bacon, sausages, eggs and beans (with several slices of tost just in case I faded away), I sat down at my laptop and began typing.

I worked merrily away, words populating virtual paper until, oops the machine froze. So intent had I been on my writing that I had neglected to save the document. The laptop, showing no immediate desire to behave itself, I took a deep breath and went to make a cup of tea. Fortunately the computer had, by the time I returned unfrozen allowing me to save my work.

I don’t know what caused the machine to freeze but suspect it may have been connected with Windows Update prompting me to install Microsoft’s latest updates. Whatever the cause I was lucky not to have lost the story I am working on – the lesson I draw is that work should be saved, on a regular basis to avoid hapless computers being thrown against walls by angry authors who, through their own forgetfulness have neglected to save their manuscript. I am pleased to report that my laptop has survived to drive me mad on a future occasion.

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